June 23rd 2022, I unplugged my 39-year-old husband, Dan, from life support. It was the worst day of my life. We were a happy family of four, torn into a thousand pieces in an instant. The nine long months leading up to that night felt like I was in an abyss.
Dan, a commercial airline pilot, had spent the past year training to become a Boeing 737 captain at Canadian North. His dedication was unwavering, and we were incredibly proud of him. However, his job came with sacrifices, including extended periods away from our family.
When Transport Canada introduced COVID vaccine mandates for airline employees, Dan was faced with a difficult choice. He had an underlying auto-immune condition and was uncertain about the vaccine's safety for him. Nevertheless, he chose to get vaccinated in order to provide for our family. But, almost immediately after his second dose, he became gravely ill.
His health deteriorated for months, and once hospitalized, he was diagnosed with hemophagocytic lymphohistiocytosis (HLH), an autoimmune condition linked to vaccine side effects. He was hospitalized and became a medical mystery, undergoing numerous treatments, but his condition only worsened.
Dan was in the hospital for just under a month, isolated due to COVID measures. The dire reality of his situation weighed heavily on our family because visitation was heavily restricted. On Father's Day, a special visit was planned so he could see our young boys, but it was canceled as Dan ended up on a ventilator the day before. Our sons never got to say goodbye to their dad.
Dan's battle ended with a brain bleed caused by blood clots throughout his body. The loss was devastating, leaving an unfillable void in our lives. We, like thousands of others, navigated the labyrinth of healthcare, learning a new vocabulary of medical terms.
I waited patiently for 14 months after, for his final autopsy report. Once received, I noticed that they had changed his cause of death from a brain bleed, to COVID 19. His vaccination status wasn't even mentioned in the report, despite that fact that the injury was officially reported by two separate doctors to Ottawa Public Health.
I was suspicious, and that led me to get a second opinion from an experienced Pathologist. I knew something was off. He reviewed Dan's entire medical history as well as the autopsy and confirmed what I already knew. The vaccine was a contraindication to Dan's Crohn's disease, and was the reason he initially became so ill.
I've struggled to talk about this because I knew it would be censored. I didn't want to be attacked or ridiculed for sharing the truth about what happened because it might go against the beliefs of others. I'm at the point now where I don't care what people say. I know what happened and the truth must come out. For Dan's sake.
This tragedy didn't need to happen, but from the depths of despair, I found the strength to persevere. Having our two boys to care for is what got me out of bed in the morning and gave me a purpose. Through it all, I remained committed to self-care. I stayed consistent with my nutrition, exercise, and yoga, providing another lifeline to pull me from the abyss. I'm now ready to use these practices to channel my grief into a mission – helping other women facing their biggest challenges and obstacles.
Today, I am a women's wellness coach, dedicated to supporting and empowering women to overcome their adversities. My journey from heartbreak to healing has given me a unique perspective and a newfound purpose. I've learned that even in the darkest of times, we can find the resilience within ourselves to triumph over tragedy.
My story is a testament to the strength of the human spirit and the power of self-care in the face of unimaginable loss. While I will always carry the memory of that fateful day, I've learned to transform my pain into a source of strength and motivation, driven to make a difference in the lives of others.
Thanks for reading this story. It was very hard for me to write, but I feel a lot better now that I've shared.
Leah B 💖
P.S- Below is a picture of Dan and I when we first met flying together at Canadian North back in 2012.
